As I promised yesterday, these next couple of days will be used to focus on how to set powerful resolutions and make them stick. I am sure you have realized that New Year's Resolutions are nothing more than a goal or goals to improve some aspect of your life set at the beginning of the year. So what we are really talking about today is effective goal-setting techniques.
"Success is the progressive achievement of a worthy ideal or goal."
~Earl Nightingale
I would also say that this is a good definition for happiness since I don't know too many happy failures. I love the quote above by Mr. Nightingale, but I want you to take notice of the word "worthy." There are people who achieve a goal and still are not very happy. You can often see this in situations where a man works hard to create a future for his family but neglects them in doing so, which can often result in divorce. When setting resolutions, select those goals that are worthy and complimentary to your total life picture. The pursuit of these goals is the road to happiness.
Steps to Setting Powerful Resolutions
1. Write down what it is that you want
The first step in making any journey is to know where it is that you want to go.
"The world makes way for the man who knows where he is going."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
The key word in this step is "want." You want to determine what it is that you want - not what your parents want, not what your spouse wants, not what your boss wants; what you want! You should be working towards your goals and dreams; not somebody else's. When you are working toward and achieving what you want, you will rarely run short on motivation and drive.
A great way of determining what you want is to create a Want List. At the top of a piece of paper, write down "I want ..." and finish that sentence in as many different ways as you possibly can. See if you can get up to 100 or more "wants." Don't worry about what you think is realistic for you to be, do or have. Let your imagination run wild! Describe your ideal life. Who do you want to be? What do you want to do? What do you want to see? Where do you want to go? Who do you want to meet?
Consider the following categories while making your list:
Romance
Children
Health & Fitness
Family
Community / Legacy
Fun
Friends
Relaxation
Personal Development
Environment
Spiritual
Financial
Career & Work
Home
Whatever you put down, make sure it is something that YOU want! And come back and add to this list as often as you think of something else.
2. Prioritize your Wish List
After you have a healthy-sized list, write in the margin to the left how soon you want to accomplish these goals. Put the number 1 for those wants you would like to accomplish in one year or less, 3 for those you want to do within 1-3 years, 5 for your wants you want done in 4-5 years and so on. This gives you tentative deadline for the goals you will set and an order to pursue them in.
3. Select one of your short-term goals that really excites you
Since we are setting a New Year's Resolution, you will want to focus on the 1-year wants. Take a moment and visualize each one individually and consider what it would be like to achieve each one. Select the one that excites you the most because this will stack the deck in your favor in terms of achieving it.
4. Write out an effective goal statement
This is a very important step and may take a little time both to explain and to do. It is all about turning your wishes into powerfully defined goals. You may have heard it said that an unwritten goal is only a wish. That is absolutely true! We will discuss more of the power that a written goal carries and how having it written down can help you achieve it in tomorrow's section. For now, let's look at putting your dreams down on paper as a powerful, effective goal statement.
The first step is to turn your wishes into S.M.A.R.T. goals. S.M.A.R.T. means Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Tangible.
To make your goals Specific, you need to answer the six "W" questions:
Who - Who is involved?
What - What do you want to accomplish?
Where - Identify the location where this will take place
When - Identify a time frame to accomplish it in
Which - Identify requirements and constraints
Why - Write down specific reasons, purpose or benefits of accomplishing the goal
Measurable means setting the criteria for measuring progress towards & the achievement of your goal. Ways to do this are to answer the questions How much? How many? How long? and How will I know when it is accomplished?
The Attainable aspect of your goal is fairly simple. The truth of the matter is that you can attain most any goal when you plan your steps wisely and establish a time frame that allows you to grow, develop and carry out those steps. So, ultimately, there is nothing you cannot do if you work hard enough, smart enough and/or long enough.
Realistic means that your goal must represent an objective toward which you are both willing and able to work. I must warn you not to set your goals too low. The reason for this is that high goals exert higher motivational force than low goals. Setting a goal such as "lose 5 pounds" are not nearly as exciting as "lose 25 pounds." You must set realistic ones based on your situation, but set a goal that will challenge you and cause you to stretch and grow.
Tangible means that your goal can be experienced with one of the five senses (i.e. taste, touch, sight, smell or hearing). If you set intangible goals such as development of personality characteristics or changing behavior patterns, these can often be tied to tangible goals or measurements. What this means is that if you set the resolution to be kinder to others this year, you have an intangible goal. Tying this goal to a goal of giving three different compliments to three different people every single day satisfies the goal of being kinder with a tangible means (hearing) of measurement.
Once you have determined the S.M.A.R.T. aspects of your goal, you are ready to write your goal statement. When you write it down, state it in the positive. This means writing down "I will put $100 in savings each month" rather than "I won't overspend my budget this year." You also want to state your goal in the present. Stating it in the present means writing your goal down as if it has already happened. This stimulates your subconscious mind and increases your level of belief that it will be accomplished.
5. Make a plan to achieve your goal
Once you have your goal statement, it is time to break it down into smaller, more achievable steps or step goals. Most people experience difficulty in achieving large tasks like writing a novel or losing 25 pounds. It is daunting and it becomes a motivational killer because you don't ever believe you will get there. It is just too big to focus on. Step goals like writing two pages per day or losing three pounds per month are more believable and, therefore, more achievable. So identify smaller step goals and assign a reward for each time you reach a milestone.
Once you have your step goals written down with their rewards, start listing every single activity that you can think of that you will need to accomplish to achieve each step goal. Write down the monthly, weekly or even daily activities that you will need to do - whatever spacing works best for you. I will warn you, however, that the greater the length of time between your activities, the weaker your motivation is to take the next step. Daily activities work the best because consistent daily steps make for successful habits that will drive you to the accomplishment of your goal. But, again, do what is best for you and your life schedule.
Once you have your periodic activities listed, prioritize them in a manner that will optimize your goal-achieving process.
Take time to identify foreseeable obstacles as well and what you will do to overcome them when the time comes. You may not think of everything up front, but doing this will leave you much better prepared for the ones you do think of. The others you will deal with as you encounter them.
6. Identify the price that must be paid and determine to pay it
"To be successful, you must decide exactly what you want to accomplish, then resolve to pay the price to get it."
~Bunker Hunt
Probably one of the major reasons why many people give up on their goals is they don't identify the price they must pay up front and determine to pay that price no matter what. Achieving a goal means making changes in your life - oftentimes, changes in some long-standing habits. This is never easy, comfortable or free. There is an emotional price, a physical price, a social price, a personal price and/or a financial price. You must make that determination to pay it or, when the going gets tough, you will most likely quit. Don't let that happen. Figure out what the price may be up front. It may mean giving up snacks and sweets. It may mean spending less time watching T.V. or hanging out with friends. It may mean earlier mornings or later nights. Whatever the cost may be, figure it out for yourself and establish an iron will to pay it no matter how tempting it may ever be to just give in.
7. Establish a Tracking & Accountability System
Set up a way to track your progress on your goal. Whether it means a spreadsheet on your computer, a calendar, a notebook - whatever works best. You need to have a way to see where you are at all times, how you are doing on any given day and where you can improve. Then share this with someone you trust. Become accountable to them so that they can help keep you motivated and honest with yourself. The reason I said someone you trust is because you need to give them "push-ability." You need to trust them to give you that kick in the pants when you need it. And when they give you that kick, keep in mind that it is because they love you and they want to see you succeed.
Those are the seven steps to setting highly effective and powerful goals. Some of these steps may take a little bit of time to establish, but it will be time well spent in preparing you and setting you up to accomplish your goals and dreams. Spend the necessary time to complete the steps above, but do them quickly so that you don't over-analyze any of them. To do so would result in "paralysis by analysis" and all you will have is a well-thought out idea of something you could have accomplished if you had acted while you were still excited about it.
Once you have your goal written down, your plan in place to achieve it and your tracking and accountability system established, the only thing that is left is to act. Do something, anything as quickly as possible. Get the ball rolling. Procrastination is the "silent killer" of your success and the longer you wait to start, the harder it will be to get going. So while the fire is still burning, while the enthusiasm is still high, take action! Do it now!!!
Come back tomorrow for Celebrate 2008! - Part 4 and learn a number of techniques and strategies that will help you keep those resolutions all year long until you have accomplished them. I'll see you then!
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