One Tiny Moment

Commitment Issues

My wife just experienced another milestone in her Mary Kay business. She just earned her 4th free car in the Mary Kay Career Car program, but this one is especially significant because it is her 1st Premier Club level car. As a result, she will be receiving a brand new, straight off the line, custom built Chevy Equinox!

I am very proud of her and all that she is accomplishing and grateful to her wonderful team of women she is working with who have made this possible. We never could have done it without them and I, personally, look forward to celebrating with many of them when they receive their first Career Car from Mary Kay!

When these women earn their first car, it really is a special day because it is a defining moment that allows them to say without equivocation, "Yes! I am a successful Mary Kay consultant!" The recognition is nice. And the commissions on their sales is great, but few people outside their family actually sees that. But when the company gives you a brand new car to drive around for free, that's a tangible, visible mark of success for them.

Unfortunately, not everyone earns their car in Mary Kay. Many of the women coming into the business say that they want the car, but so few ever actually earn it.

Why?

In a word...

COMMITMENT!

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, the providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way. I learned a deep respect for one of Goethe's couplets:

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.

Boldness has genius, power and magic in it!"

W. H. Murray in The Scottish Himalaya Expedition, 1951

Every single woman on my wife's team, regardless of their current circumstances, could drive a brand new car in the next six months or less if they committed themselves to doing it. Do you want to know how I know? Because my wife has done it four times!!! As great as my wife is (and I do think she is pretty spectacular) she started at the same place as everyone else. But she committed herself to doing what her Director and National told her to do in order to get the results she wanted to get.

She still does that. Just three days ago, she was $3,000 in team wholesale orders away from earning her car. That equates to over $6,000 in retail product. And if that $3,000 in orders hadn't been put in by the end of the month, my wife would have had to start all over from the beginning to try and earn this car over the next six months. I'll be honest with you. She was a little frustrated to be so close and yet still be so far away.

We had several team members step up in big ways. One of them, on her first solo class, sold $1,043. (Well done, grasshopper! She has now made over $1,100 in PROFIT over her first two classes and she was one who joined the company just to have a little extra spending money. Not too shabby!) We had a couple $200 orders and a $500 order and even a $43 order, among others, helped get us a little closer. But all that would not have been enough if my wife hadn't committed herself to making it happen NO MATTER WHAT!!! She went to work and sold enough in the last two days to place a $600 of her own. Now that's commitment to a goal!

“There's a difference between interest and commitment. When you're interested in doing something, you do it only when circumstances permit. When you're committed to something, you accept no excuses; only results.”

There is always a reason why someone doesn't commit to their goal. I've heard people use pets, parents, illness, spouses, car trouble, kids, church assignments, friends and a plethora of other "reasons" why they can't keep their commitments. It makes me laugh to hear people tell my wife, "My family comes first!" as if to imply hers does not. And yet my wife spends loads of time with our kids, serves actively in our church, hangs out with friends, spends quality time with me and still runs a successful, profitable business with the car score being 4-0 in my wife's favor!

If your family really comes first, discipline yourself, establish better time management habits and commit yourself to succeeding for your family so that you aren't struggling so badly financially. Imagine for one moment how much less stressful your marriage would be with the extra income a successful business would provide. At least the kids won't be embarrassed by the car you drive when you drop them off at school.

I'm not saying that there aren't valid reasons out there for not keeping a commitment. We totally understand those situations and we feel bad when they happen. But here is a good test for whether you have a good reason or just a poor excuse:

• Is it a reason you would give if you had to call your boss at the last second to tell them you weren't going to show up at work that day?
• Would you still have a job the next day if you did give that reason?

In case you are wondering, reasons like "My dog is sick", "My best friend came into town" and "I just don't feel like it right now" will land you in the unemployment line.

It is sad how many women I have seen who have come into this business over the last few years who had such high hopes and grand dreams that have left it to get a job where the discipline of showing up is enforced, you have absolutely no control over how much you earn and, no matter how good you are at your job, they will never, ever give you a free car. Don't let that be you.

Whatever worthwhile goal you may have, remember the example set by Spanish Conquistador Hernando Cortez. When he landed in Mexico, he gave his men the orders to burn the ships. He cut off their escape route. There would be no retreat. They would succeed in their mission or they would die trying.

“Desire is the key to motivation, but it's determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal - a commitment to excellence - that will enable you to attain the success you seek.”
~ Mario Andretti

Commit yourself to your goals and your dreams at every step of the process. Re-commit every morning when you wake up no matter how poor your results may have been from the day before. Throw out your excuses and press on through your trials.

Amazing things lie within your reach if you commit yourself to achieving them!

Are You Asking for It?

"Everything you want is out there waiting for you to ask. Everything you want also wants you. But you have to take action to get it."

~ Jules Renard

Do you know what you want in life?

Do you have a vision of the kind of lifestyle you want to enjoy?

It is out there waiting for you. And it wants you as much as you want it! All you have to do is ask for it.

But the only true way to ask is to act ... and not just act once ... but act in a repeated, consistent manner until life has no other option than to give you what you have asked for.

Children are great examples of this. When our boys want my attention it's "Dad! ... Dad! ... Dad! ... Dad! ... Dad! ... Dad! ... Dad!" until I'm thinking, "Boy, you're really asking for it!"

What just happened there?

They got my attention even when I didn't particularly want to give it to them in that moment. And it was all because they acted and persisted in their actions until they got what they were asking for.

So, let me ask you again...

Do you know what you want in life?

Are you asking for it?

Suffer Now

“I hated every minute of training, but I said, 'Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.'”
~ Muhammad Ali

A Cheerful Thought...

"Be of good cheer. Do not think of today's failures, but of the success that may come tomorrow. You have set yourselves a difficult task, but you will succeed if you persevere; and you will find a joy in overcoming obstacles."
~ Helen Keller

How to Cash It In for Success

I was reading the second chapter of Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich when I came across a profound truth that reminded me of a financial lesson I learned years ago. Before I reveal the truth, let me share with you the lesson of Realized Gains and Losses:

If you were to take $3,000 and invest it in the stock market at a price of $10 per share, you would have 300 shares of stock. As it sometimes does, the stock price drops to $7 per share. Emotional investors start to panic at this point. After all, they bought the stock at $10 because it had already dropped to this low price and they expected it to shoot back up. But now it dropped even lower and they think they just lost $900 in the transaction.

But what have they really lost? They bought 300 shares and, even though the price dropped, they still have 300 shares. It isn't until they sell those shares that they REALIZE a gain or a loss. And those panicky people that are dumping their shares at $7 a share are kicking themselves at the end of the week when the price rockets back up to $15 a share.

What does all this have to do with Think and Grow Rich?

In the second chapter, Hill writes of the power of Desire. He lists a number of people who have passed through difficulties and disappointment before they achieved anything of consequence. At the end of the short paragraph on Helen Keller, Hill writes:

"...no one is ever defeated until defeat has been accepted as a reality."
Much like the investor in the example above, you have only lost when you accept that reality and decide to cash it in. Nobody ever becomes great or successful without having to experience setbacks, frustrations and adversity. Anybody who tells you otherwise is lying to you. It is only those who continue to believe in their personal value and capability for success that refuse to accept that failure and push on until they reach their success.

What would have happened to Thomas Edison if he had believed the teacher that told him he was too stupid to learn anything and that he should seek a profession where he might succeed by virtue of his pleasant personality?

What would have happened to Oprah Winfrey if she had accepted the judgment that she "had no business anchoring the news in a major market" when she was fired as a TV news anchor?

What would have happened to Walt Disney if he had accepted the assessment that he lacked imagination and had no original ideas" when he was fired by a newspaper editor?

What would have happened to Michael Jordan if he had hung up his basketball shoes when he was cut from his high school team?

What will happen to you if you accept defeat at any stage of your journey? Then nobody will know the real you and the greatness you have to share with the world. Don't let that happen! Do not cash it in until you stand in the winner's circle, triumphant!

Tips for Overcoming Temporary Defeat:

1. Keep your dream firmly fixed in your mind at all times. Create visual reminders like a dream board. Spend a few minutes every morning and every evening visualizing you accomplishing your dream and the benefits that will bring. Really live it!

2. Trust in the value of your dream. Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen were rejected by 144 different publishers that didn't believe a book of short stories would sell when they tried to get Chicken Soup for the Soul published. But they persisted because they knew people wanted what was in that book. People were asking them all the time where they could read the stories they shared in their presentations. When someone rejects you and your dream, trust that there are people waiting for you to succeed; if for no other reason than to believe that it is possible for them, too.

3. Treat each setback as a learning opportunity. Napoleon Hill said that "every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit." Find the lesson in each in every failure and learn from it. It is these lessons that teach you how to become successful.

4. Trust in the power of numbers. Athletes are great examples of the fact that those who are persistent enough to endure failure will succeed. The year that Babe Ruth set the major league record of 714 home runs, he also set another record by striking out 1,330 times. You have to be willing to fail and fail again in order to be successful. This is true in sports, business or any other area of life you are seeking success in. The only people who never fail are those who never try to begin with.

5. Believe and reaffirm your capability of success. I love the quote by Michael Jordan where he says: "I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. And I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is precisely why I succeed." This quote may seem to be more in line with the last point, but I use it here because it illustrates the confidence he had in his ability to win. Our egos, our self-esteem can be so fragile at times and they can take a major hit with every setback or failure. When this happens, be like Mike and just keep shooting with full confidence that your shots are going in. Because when you start hitting your shots, you achieve a mind-body-spirit connection that makes you unstoppable!

An Important Resolution Most People Don't Make

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other."
~ Abraham Lincoln

Lincoln knew what he was talking about on the topic of resolving to succeed. Just take a look at his résumé:
· Lost job, 1832
· Defeated for legislature, 1832
· Failed in business, 1833
· Elected to legislature, 1834
· Sweetheart (Ann Rutledge) died, 1835
· Had nervous breakdown, 1836
· Defeated for Speaker, 1838
· Defeated for nomination for Congress, 1843
· Elected to Congress, 1846
· Lost renomination, 1848
· Rejected for Land Officer, 1849
· Defeated for Senate, 1854
· Defeated for nomination for Vice-President, 1856
· Again defeated for Senate, 1858
· Elected President, 1860

He could have given up at any one of those failures. I am sure that most of us would have. But he resolved to succeed in his goals and he stuck with it until he did. That resolution carried him all the way to the White House and into the history books.

What will people write about you when you are gone from this earth?

Define your dreams, set your goals and resolve to succeed at them no matter what happens. Failures are not brick walls that stop you. They are merely tests of your resolution to succeed; tests of how badly you want it. And if your resolution is strong enough, those brick walls will be mere speed bumps that can never stop you.

Can You Afford to Quit?

Hello, everyone! I know it has been a while since I have posted and I would apologize for my absence ... but I am not really sorry because I have been very busy in the pursuit of a major goal.

Shortly after my last post, I started a telecommunications business with ACN and I have been working hard this past month and a half introducing the business and the services we offer to everybody I know. It is an amazing opportunity and I am having a blast as I change people's lives and create a bright future for me and my family.

About a week after I started my business, I went to a conference in Idaho where I heard an amazing truth that has really stuck with me and I have been dying to share with all of you.

Marlene Brehm was the guest speaker from California and shared a lot of awesome information on the importance of having a proper mindset, the power of belief and a lot of other topics to help us succeed in this business. She shared one story of when she introduced the business to a well-to-do gentleman that she had become acquainted with. The gentleman saw the potential of the business and asked how much it would cost him to get involved.

"499," Marlene replied.

To Marlene's surprise the gentleman hesitated and was thoughtful for a few moments after which he replied, "Well, it will probably take me a few months to get that kind of money together. Check back with me here in a couple of months and I think I will have it all by then and we can get going."

Marlene was completely confused. This man was very well off and yet he was saying that it would take a couple of months to get $499 together. Then it dawned on her. He thought she meant $499,000! And in spite of that misconception, he was still committed to joining the business!

The point that I want to make with this story is how much more committed do you think that gentleman was to succeeding in ACN when he was ready to sign up with a $499,000 investment than someone who is only investing $499? Even those of us who are living paycheck to paycheck can stand to lose $499. But what if it was, $4,990? Or $49,900? Or finally the $499,000? At what point would the pain of loss become great enough to raise your determination to succeed to the "Do or Die!" level?

This is true of any goal or resolution we set. People who set the goal of losing weight and treat it as being only 20 pounds fail. It is those who realize it is 20 more years of their life that they will have due to healthy eating habits and regular exercise that win. People who set the goal of getting out of debt and treat the $50 that they could add to their monthly payment as insignificant stay in debt much longer or get deeper in debt. Those who think of that $50 as the key to getting out of debt months earlier and saving them thousands of dollars in interest (which it does) succeed and are out of debt sooner.

You have to accept the fact that quitting on your goals has a much higher cost than you think. It is the Opportunity Cost! Everyone who has ever taken an economics course will recognize this term as the cost of an alternative that must be foregone in order to pursue a certain action. When you quit on your goals and dreams (you can never fail - you either succeed or you quit), you automatically incur the cost of whatever benefits you would have realized if you had stuck with it until you succeed.

My initial cost when I started a business with ACN was only $499, but it is not a $499 business to me. I could quit a $499 business and not feel too bad about it. It is a $499,000,000 business to me because that is the amount of money that I leave on the table over my lifetime if I quit. And that is only a fraction of the value of the time and the adventures that I will have with my wife and my kids, the value of the friends that I will make as I work with others, and the value of the joy that I will receive watching other people's lives change for the better because I had the courage and the tenacity to keep going on my goals and to never quit!

Many of us are beginning to consider what resolutions we are going to set for the coming year. If you are not a resolution maker, I hope you have some goals that you are working on that will change your life and the lives of others for the better. As you set your goals and your resolutions, write down the Opportunity Cost of everything you give up if you quit. Keep that and your "Why" in the forefront of your mind whenever the going gets tough to remind yourself that you cannot afford to quit!

If the cost isn't great enough to keep you from quitting, you either aren't thinking hard enough or perhaps you have set some goals that really don't mean that much to you at all. If it is the latter, it may be time to set more worthwhile goals.

So go for your goals and be determined to never incur the cost that comes with quitting. Because if you keep going long enough and are willing to overcome any obstacle that gets in your way, you will succeed!

"Effort only fully releases its reward after a person refuses to quit."
~ Napoleon Hill

The Difference Between Winning and Losing

Over the years, I have read many stories and articles about successful people and listened to many different stories of people who have failed. In each of those stories, those who succeeded are not that different from those who failed. They each had a dream. They each took steps to achieve their dream. They each had moments of doubt. They each faced obstacles. They each had critics in abundance. They each struggled, strived and suffered. So why was there a difference in their outcome?

"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."
~ Thomas Edison

When I played basketball in high school, we were given a basketball "handbook" that was filled with information on drills designed to improve areas of your game, team and school rules, and inspirational and motivational quotes and stories interspersed throughout the book. One quote that has stuck with me through the years was by Vince Lombardi who said: "Winners never quit and quitters never win." I've applied that quote in sports, in relationships, in every area of my life and have learned that it isn't always the strongest, smartest or even most talented that wins. It is the one that lasts the longest.

"Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."
~ Calvin Coolidge

When we start on a goal - be it building a business, getting out of debt, writing a novel, whatever it may be - we never anticipate that there will ever be a point where we will want to quit. We start off excited and focused on achieving our end result and we just go to work fully expecting that we will be victorious. But then we start to struggle. The results don't come fast enough or it is more difficult than we thought it would be (let me share with you a little secret about human nature - it is always more difficult than we think it will be because we never plan on it being that difficult) or some other excuse and we quit on our dream. We become so focused on the pain of that small moment of time that we completely forget or ignore how painful the rest of our life is going to be because we gave up and quit trying to achieve our goal.

"Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever."
~ Lance Armstrong

Can you imagine what would happen if a mother quit right when giving childbirth got painful? Can you imagine the results if a weightlifter quit right when it started to burn? Can you imagine the life of the student that decides to quit the first time they did not get an "A" on a test? Where has quitting ever done anybody any good?

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."
~ Thomas Edison

You never know when your big break is going to come in the process. You never know just at what point things are going to click into place and it is all going to start to flow. You just have to trust that, when you are pedaling up the side of a mountain, at some point you are going to reach the peak and then you can coast down the other side picking up speed as you go. You just have to last longer than the upward slope does.

"When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."
~ Franklin D. Roosevelt

Whatever goal you are pursuing, check your determination level. Are you content with trying to achieve it? (Remember, "trying" is simply failing with honor.) Or are you at the REFUSE TO LOSE! level where it doesn't matter what comes your way - you triumph no matter what? The only person that can keep you from succeeding is you. If others have done what you dream of doing, you can do it, too! If nobody has ever done it, then be the first!!! But never, never, never quit on your dreams.

Don't You Quit!
~ Unknown

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest! if you must; but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up, though the pace seems slow;
You might succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup.
And he learned too late, when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit;
It's when things seem worst that you mustn't quit.

I Just Have To!

I love sports movies - even the goofy kid movies put out by companies like Disney. The reason is that in every sport movie there is a defining moment of struggle. And in that moment, there is a lesson taught that has real life applications.

The other night I was watching the movie Rookie of the Year with my boys. The defining moment of the movie came in the second game that Henry was sent in to pitch. Henry is nervous and is struggling with his control. The lesson comes when Chet "The Rocket" Steadman is sent to the mound by the team manager to calm Henry down and give him some advice. Not knowing what to say, Chet tells Henry to use his "have to". He explains that this is the place you go when you are full of fear. You use your "have to" to pull yourself through in spite of the fear. Henry nods even though he doesn't understand and even Chet walks back to the dugout muttering "The 'have to'. What the heck was I talking about?" But the advice worked and Henry starts throwing 100 mph strikes and saves the game.

The reason this lesson intrigues me is because the following morning I was listening to a CD from Anthony Robbins' Personal Power II series where he was talking about the "7 Wealth Wounds". He makes the point that successful people get what they want in life because they make it a "have to". They will not accept any other alternative. He uses people who maintain a healthy weight as an example. If they set 130 lbs as the weight they have to maintain, the minute it creeps up to 132-133 they immediately do whatever they have to do to get back down to that 130 or even just a little below.

People who have achieved financial abundance operate the same way. They set a financial level that they have to reach and maintain and they do whatever it takes to get there. They are not content with just getting by even when just getting by may be significantly better than where they currently are. They have to be financially well off and nothing is going to stop them from reaching that point.

Are you someone who settles for getting by or even just improving a little from where you are now? I know I have been guilty of that. When I have had serious financial struggles (even to the point where a financial counselor told my wife and I that our only option was bankruptcy), my "have to" kicked in and I did whatever I needed to do to overcome the situation. Unfortunately, I failed to set my sights above the "getting by" level where I made just enough to cover my bills. So what happens is a medical emergency or major car repair would come along and wipe out my savings and knock me right back into financial distress.

A perfect example of this is a couple of years ago my wife and I started following Dave Ramsey's "Baby Steps" to getting out of debt. We built up $1,000 in savings for an emergency fund and went to work on paying off our smallest debt balance. A couple of months later the transmission on our van blew out. We didn't have the option of not repairing it because the van was our only means of transportation and essential to making the extra money that was keeping us afloat financially and enabling us to pay down our debt. The repair cost us $2,500. You can probably guess where we had to pull the additional $1,500 from.

I was listening to Dave's radio show the other night on the way home from work when I heard him advise a caller not to stay at the $1,000 savings level for very long because then you are just asking for trouble. I immediately thought to myself "Dave! Where was this level of honesty three years ago when we got killed financially while following your advice?" The truth of the matter is that we did not follow his advice - not entirely anyways. He advises working with "gazelle-like" intensity when setting up the emergency fund and paying off the debt. Once we had the fund in place and were paying our bills, we lost that intensity. We stopped working from our "have to" because it was no longer a have to in order to survive.

I was thinking about all of this last night and had a personal breakthrough that many of you can learn from as well. The reason why I settle for survival rather than making abundance my "have to" is that the pain was gone. In the Personal Power II series, Anthony Robbins talks about how the two greatest motivators in life are pain and pleasure and that pain is the greater motivator out of the two of them. Pain drives the "have to". When I was faced with the pain of bankruptcy, I kicked things up a notch or two to get away from that pain. Then when things leveled out financially the pain was gone and I settled back into a groove that kept us above that line where the pain of not being able to pay my bills would start up again, but just barely above. I derived pleasure from having gotten our family back to a level where we could survive again financially and the pain had disappeared so I had met my needs.

Now, I recognize that I would get more pleasure if I were living much further above that line, but that would mean a lot of hard work, it might mean more time away from my family, it would mean giving up some things that I enjoy right now; all things I associate pain with. So I was inadvertently motivating myself to stay right above one pain line and right below another. I had trapped myself in a very small comfort zone!

Do you have any areas in your life where you have done something similar? It may not be finances, but it may be related to weight loss, to self-improvement, to relationships, to parenting; it could be anything. Just look for an area where you are just getting by. Or look for areas in your life where you improved in the past, but then you just stopped and didn't go any further. What is motivating you to remain mediocre? What pleasure do you get from not pursuing your dreams? What pains are you effectively avoiding by not going after what you really want in life? Write it all down on a sheet of paper right now so that you can see clearly how you have trapped yourself where you are right now. Go ahead! I will wait until you are done.

Did you write it all down? I hope you did because, if you didn't, the rest of this post won't make a difference to you so you might as well quit reading right now and go find another blog to waste your time at. But it isn't to late too start changing your life right now. Write it all down right now!!!

Now, if you did write it all down, you probably experienced a moment of feeling a bit foolish. I know I did. I could now see how I was to blame for where I was at financially. I could no longer blame circumstances because I had already proven that I could overcome circumstances to get from being a step away from bankruptcy to being financially stable. But I was the one to blame for it not getting any better than that.

Did you see what happened there? I started to feel a NEW pain for my situation. And that is the first step to moving on from where you currently are - when it is too painful to stay!

So here are the steps that are going to enable you and me to motivate ourselves to move on from where we are right now. Take out a clean sheet of paper and...

1. Write down a definite goal for where you really want to be.

This is not a goal for where you think you can get to. This is where you really want to be. Just focus for a moment on WHAT you want and leave the HOW you are going to get it for later. Don't settle on a goal that is less than your best vision of your future. You deserve the best so allow yourself to have it!

State your goal in the present and make it S.M.A.R.T.

Specific - Does you goal answer the six "W" questions: Who, What, Where, When, Which, and Why?
Measurable - Does your goal answer the questions of how much, how many and how will I know when it is accomplished?
Attainable - There is very little that you cannot do if you are determined to do it. Use your inner compass to determine what is possible for you. Picture yourself in your mind accomplishing your goal. If you can "see" yourself doing it, it is attainable.
Realistic - A goal is realistic if it represents an objective toward which you are both willing and able to work. If you truly believe that it can be accomplished, then it is realistic.
Timely - Every goal needs a deadline. It creates a sense of urgency and has the added benefit of engaging your subconscious mind in the process. So when do you intend to complete your goal by?

T can also stand for Tangible, which means that your goal can be experienced with one of the senses (i.e. taste, touch, sight, smell and/or hearing). Tangible goals have a better chance of being specific, realistic and measurable, thus making them attainable.

After you have written down your new goal...

2. Write down all the pleasure you will get out of attaining that goal.

Get creative and list all the reasons reaching that goal will bring you pleasure. How much better will you feel? What will it do for your self-esteem when you pull it off? Who will it inspire? What will you have that you didn't have before? What options and opportunities will you now have? List it all!

Now that you have all the pleasure laid out before you, it's time to heap a bit of pain on top...

3. Write down all the pain you will experience if you don't go for the goal.

What are all the things you are going to miss out on if you don't do it? What embarrassments will you suffer? Who will follow your example and suffer the same frustrations you have? What will your life be life 5, 10, or 20 years down the line as you look at how different your life could have been if you had just changed it now? Get it all out there and notice how you are feeling as you write it all down.

I am willing to bet that you are going to start feeling some of that pain right now. GOOD! This changes your goal from a "want to" to a "have to". You now have to be completely debt free. You now have to maintain your weight at 130 lbs. You now have to learn to play that piano. You now have to increase your personal income by an additional $2,500 per month. The level you are now at should no longer feel comfortable. You have to move up!

You now have a new set of motivations. Take that old list and throw it away because that isn't you anymore. You are no longer content with mediocrity. It's time to go for it! So now it is time to...

4. Brainstorm a list of all the different things you could start doing today that would start you on the path to where you want to be.

Once you have your list of actions you can take...

5. Pick one thing to do today and do it!

"People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing ... that's why we recommend it daily."
~ Zig Ziglar

Keep your new list of motivations in a safe place and review them every single day. Remind yourself of the reasons why you are doing what you are doing and what will you suffer if you don't. That way when you come up against a seemingly insurmountable obstacle, they will be fresh in your mind and you will refuse to be stopped ... because you just have to succeed!

The First Step - Part 3 of 7

“The two important things I did learn were that you are as powerful and strong as you allow yourself to be, and that the most difficult part of any endeavour is taking the first step, making the first decision.”

~ Robyn Davidson

Have you ever felt powerless and weak when it came to achieving something important to you? I know I have. But like Robyn, I learned that I was far more powerful, far stronger than I initially believed I was. Let me share an example with you.

A number of years ago, I hiked to the rim of Mt. Saint Helen's with some members of my family. I was in pretty good shape and was cruising up the slope, at one point carrying my sister's backpack along with my own. But there came a point when my legs cramped up unexpectantly. It started out as just being really uncomfortable, but when we broke clear of the boulders and hit the pebbly slope that stretched to the rim of the volcano's crater, it quickly became intensely painful and my pace ground to a near-complete stop.

Seeing how much pain I was in, my father suggested I just sit and rest and they would pick me up on the way back down and help me reach the bottom. As appealing as it was to sit down at that moment and ease the pain, I simply replied that I was still moving. I started picking out points on the slope to walk to, but the more intense the pain got, the farther away those points seemed. I finally just started telling myself, "Take 10 more steps. You can do that much."

So, I took 10 more steps. Once I hit the tenth step, I told myself to take 10 more. And I kept taking 10 more until I collapsed with quivering legs on the crater's rim, looking down at the lava dome at its center. The interesting thing was that, while I was one of the last in our group to reach the rim, I was the first to reach the bottom, running and jumping all the way down completely free of pain, where I waited for the rest of my group to wearily straggle back to the car.

I learned the important lesson that day that I am far stronger than I tend to allow myself to be. That applies to more than just my physical body. I am smarter, wiser, and mentally tougher as well. And now, one of the things I enjoy most is pushing myself to see just how far I can go and how much I can achieve.

Sometimes, we just have to get out of our own way and see how far we can go. We have to erase the word "can't" from our vocabulary and keep on pushing on to see just exactly what we can do. The majority of the limits we have encountered exist only in our own minds. We have to make that difficult decision to take that first step beyond what we think we can do, and another after that, and another after that until we reach our desired destination.

So wherever you feel weak, wherever you feel you have gone just as far as you can possibly go and you have done all you can possibly do, take 10 more steps or improve by just 1% and allow yourself to be stronger and more powerful than you previously thought you were. And if you do it once, you can very well do it again, and again, and again.

Action Steps:
1. Write down an area where you wish you were better.
2. Write down you personal best achievement in this area.
3. Now write down what it would mean in terms of achievement to "take 10 more steps" or improve in this area by just 1%.
4. Take the first step beyond your previous record and keep on moving!

When the wind does not blow your way...

"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination."

~ Jimmy Dean

A Personal Apology

It has been nearly 2 months since I last posted in this blog. If there is anyone out there that has been checking back regularly, I apologize for my absence. There have been many a time that I thought about writing a new post to inspire, encourage, advise and to breathe new life and ideas into the reader who comes by for a visit, but I just couldn't do it. I was just too discouraged, stressed and depressed.

Those of you that know me personally may be well-acquainted with my imperfections and flaws, but what many of you may not know is that depression was something that I struggled with for years. Under very special circumstances, I received inspired counsel at the age of 14 from a religious leader that did not know me personally in which I was told to beware of depression as that was a temptation that I would struggle with. Knowing that I was going to struggle with depression, however, did not provide me with the tools necessary to overcome it. It took me many years to figure out why I was depressed so often.

I don't want you to think that my life was especially miserable or difficult. I was pretty much an average American teenager. I had many bright, happy and very enjoyable moments in life, but they seemed to slip through my fingers so easily leaving more than enough room for the darkness that flowed into its place. I eventually learned that a major cause of my depression was my focus on all the things I did not have in life rather than being grateful for the abundance of health, talents, friends, education and wealth that I had been blessed with.

I may not have been the strongest or fastest individual, but I had a complete, healthy, relatively disease-free body that enabled me to play any sport I desired at an average to above-average level.

I may not have been the most-talented individual at sports, music, art or any other area of interest, but I could play sports, picked up on how to play the piano and guitar, re-taught myself how to sing after a throat injury (you can read more about that here), I could draw, paint and sculpt better than the average person and could virtually do anything that I set my mind to if I was willing to put in the time.

I may not have been the most popular individual, but I had many fun and loving friends of all ages in spite of my tendency to behave as a shy person would and hang in the background.

I may not have been the smartest kid in the class or pulled straight A's, but I quickly learned anything I wanted to and could retain the bulk of what I read freeing me from having to put in very much time reviewing and studying.

And I may not have had much money or material possessions growing up (in fact, my family's income was below the average and my parents had to make the dollar stretch with six kids), but I had more than kids in third-world countries, I had the ability and opportunity to work, and everything I listed above along with my family and many other things I did not mention gave me a very blessed and abundant life.

This last category has been the reason for my latest struggles. It is very difficult to focus on long-range goals like completing The Millionaire Marathon when my urgent, short-range issues keep rising up to slap you in the face every single day. I became frustrated, despondent and withdrew into myself to relive the pain again and again and again.


I am happy to say that I have overcome that through the application of an important lesson we all must remember when we are not happy with the way things are:

Do something; anything!!!

I couldn't change the whole situation in that moment, but I could tackle one small part of it and I did. I went to work with an urgency and focused on a future happy outcome. Just in the moving and the doing, hope revives and faith starts to rebuild. Making any sort of progress, no matter how small and insignificant it may seem, is a million times better than doing nothing at all.

Am I out of the woods, yet? No. But I am closer this week than I was last week and I will be even closer next week. I am just taking it one day at a time and making sure that my head and my heart stay in the right place.

As far as posting to this blog, I will resume my efforts to relay and share uplifting, motivating and hopefully inspiring material as often as I am able to do so. I am still working on the Universal Law series that I mentioned nearly 2 months ago and will finish it when I can, but I have some financial projects that take priority right now. So check back from time to time to see where I am at and, if you feel like doing so, leave a comment to let me know you are following and what you find interesting and helpful. If there are topics that you struggle with that you would like some input on, let me know and I will be happy to offer what I can.

I also invite you to come over to my personal blog at http://www.niceguyblogging.blogspot.com/ and read about the Million Step March challenge that I am participating in and the progress I am making with it.

The Most Valuable Question You May Ever Ask

As you begin to take action toward the fulfillment of your goals and dreams, you must realize that not every action will be perfect.

Not every action will produce the desired result. Not every action will work.

Making mistakes, getting it almost right, and experimenting to see what happens are all part of the process of eventually getting it right.

Thomas Edison is reported to have tried over 2,000 different experiments that failed before he finally got the light bulb to work. He once told a reporter that, from his perspective, he had never failed at all. Inventing the light bulb was just a 2,000-step process. If you can adopt that attitude, then you can be free to take an action, notice what result you get, and then adjust your next actions based on the feedback you have received.

Ready, Fire, Aim!
Don’t be afraid to just jump in and get started moving toward your goals. As long as you pay attention to the feedback you receive, you will make progress. Just getting into the game and firing allows you to correct and refine your aim.

The Most Valuable Question You May Ever Learn
In the 1980s, a multimillionaire businessman taught me a question that radically changed the quality of my life. So what is this magical question that can improve the quality of every relationship you are in, every product you produce, every service you deliver, every meeting you conduct, every class you teach and every transaction you enter into?

Here it is:

“On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate the quality of our relationship during the last week?”

Here are a number of variations on the same question that have served me well over the years...

“On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate…

• our service?
• my teaching?
• our product?
• this class/seminar/workshop?
• this meeting?
• our date/vacation?
• our performance?
• this meal?
• my coaching/managing?
• this book/recording/show?
• my parenting/babysitting?

Any answer less than a 10 always gets this follow-up question:

“What would it take to make it a 10?”

This is where the *really* valuable information comes from. Knowing that a person is dissatisfied is not enough. Knowing in detail what will satisfy them gives you the information you need to do whatever it takes to create a winning product, service or relationship.

There Are Two Kinds of Feedback
There are two kinds of feedback you might encounter – negative and positive. We tend to prefer the positive – that is, results, money, praise, promotion, raise, awards, happiness, inner-peace, etc. It feels betters. It tells us we are on course and doing the right thing.

We tend not to like negative feedback – lack of results, little or no money, criticism, poor evaluations, complaints, unhappiness, inner conflict, pain, etc.

However, there is as much useful data in negative feedback as there is in positive feedback. It tells us that we are off course, headed in the wrong direction, doing the wrong thing. This is priceless information!

In fact, it’s so valuable that one of the most useful projects you could undertake is to change how you respond to negative feedback. I like to refer to negative feedback as information for “improvement opportunities.” Here is a place where I can get better.

Ask Yourself for Feedback
In addition to asking others for feedback, you need to ask yourself for feedback, too. More than any other source of feedback, your body will tell you whether or not you are on course or not. When you are relaxed and happy, your body is telling you that you are on track. When you are constantly exhausted, tense, in pain, unhappy and angry, then you are off track.

Take time to listen to what your body is saying to you. Take time to listen to your physical sensations and your feelings. They are sending you important messages. Are you listening?

Remember, Feedback Is Simply Information
You don’t have to take it personally. Just welcome it and use it.

For more on Using Feedback to Your Advantage, review Principle #19 in The Success Principles. It’s one of the most important principles you can apply.

© 2007 Jack Canfield
Are you "stuck" in this area?
Send me your most pressing question about this topic, then join me for our monthly "Ask Jack Canfield" Tele-Clinic! http://www.askjackcanfield.com/


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Jack Canfield, America’s Success Coach, is the founder and co-creator of the billion-dollar book brand Chicken Soup for the Soul and a leading authority on Peak Performance. If you're ready to jump-start your life, make more money, and have more fun and joy in all that you do, get your FREE success tips from Jack Canfield now at: http://www.freesuccessstrategies.com/

How to Get Lucky!

I stumbled across a blog today at http://www.thesimpledollar.com/ and read a post of a review of the book Never Wrestle With A Pig by Mark McCormack. The author of the blog highlighted some of the points the book made, but I want to mention just one that is vitally important. In the first chapter of the book, Give Yourself A Reality Check, McCormack talks of our need to realize that you have to work hard to make it happen.

I agree 100% with that point. People who think that it is easy for someone else to succeed and it should be easy for them as well don't really know what they are talking about. They aren't privy to the years of experience that built up the skills that makes what they are doing now look easy. They aren't privy to the time they spent cultivating relationships, studying and gaining essential knowledge, establishing habits of setting goals and achieving them, becoming proficient in establishing effective plans that lead to successful accomplishments, etc. We just sit back and classify them as "lucky" and wish we could be lucky just like them.

"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity."
~ Seneca

One of the points McCormack makes that I want here is that if you're relying on luck to carry you through something, it probably won't work! You need to put all your effort into making yourself "luck proof" just as these "lucky" people have done. Consistent winners are those who have done everything they can to stack the odds in their favor. They plan and prepare and then do absolutely EVERYTHING in their power to bring about favorable results.

"I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it."
~ Thomas Jefferson

Whatever it is that you want in life, plan for it, prepare for it, persistently pursue it and you, too, can get lucky!

How Winning Is Done

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that!"

~ Sylvester Stallone as Rocky in Rocky Balboa

SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP!

A parable is told of a farmer who owned an old mule. The mule fell into the farmer's well. The farmer heard the mule 'braying' - or - whatever mules do when they fall into wells. After carefully assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the mule, but decided that neither the mule nor the well was worth the trouble of saving. Instead, he called his neighbors together and told them what had happened...and enlisted them to help haul dirt to bury the old mule in the well and put him out of his misery.

Initially, the old mule was hysterical! But as the farmer and his neighbors continued shoveling and the dirt hit his back...a thought struck him. It suddenly dawned on him that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back...HE SHOULD SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP! This he did, blow after blow.

"Shake it off and step up...shake it off and step up...shake it off and step up!" he repeated to encourage himself. No matter how painful the blows, or distressing the situation seemed the old mule fought "panic" and just kept right on SHAKING IT OFF AND STEPPING UP!

You're right! It wasn't long before the old mule, battered and exhausted, STEPPED TRIUMPHANTLY OVER THE WALL OF THAT WELL! What seemed like it would bury him, actually blessed him...all because of the manner in which he handled his adversity.

THAT'S LIFE! If we face our problems and respond to them positively, and refuse to give in to panic, bitterness, or self-pity...THE ADVERSITIES THAT COME ALONG TO BURY US USUALLY HAVE WITHIN THEM THE POTENTIAL TO BENEFIT AND BLESS US! Remember that FORGIVENESS--FAITH--PRAYER-- PRAISE and HOPE...all are excellent ways to "SHAKE IT OFF AND STEP UP" out of the wells in which we find ourselves!

- Author Unknown

The Secret Is Out!

"The 'secret of success' is so simple that it is overlooked by most people. Whatever you want you can have, if you want it badly enough, and if you are willing to persist long enough and hard enough in doing what others have done to accomplish similar things before you."
~ Brian Tracy, Maximum Achievement

I found this in the introduction to Brian Tracy's book, Maximum Achievement. What I want you to take from this is that you can have whatever you want. You just have to:

Want it badly enough - Do you have a burning desire to accomplish this goal? If not, crank up the flame!

Be willing to persist long enough and hard enough - Most people quit on the 1-yard line and don't realize it. Will you? Or are you willing to keep on pushing until you have scored that touchdown?

Do what others have done to accomplish similar things before you - Achieving success is much like opening a combination lock. When you turn to the right numbers in the right sequence, the lock will open for you every time. The right combination of thoughts and actions will enable to accomplish pretty much anything you want, and you can figure that out if you search long enough and hard enough. You can also shortcut the process by watching and studying those who have achieved something similar to what you and learning what it is that they did to overcome their obstacles and their success. You don't have to recreate the wheel to be successful!

What You Can Learn from an Oyster

The Oyster

There once was an oyster whose story I tell,
Who found that some sand had got into his shell.
It was only a grain but it gave him great pain,
For oysters have feelings although they're so plain.

Now, did he berate the harsh workings of fate
That had brought him to such a deplorable state?
Did he curse at the government, cry for election,
And claim that the sea should have given him protection?

No--He said to himself as he lay on a shell,
Since I cannot remove it, I shall try to improve it.
Now the years have rolled around, as the years always do,
And he came to his ultimate destiny--stew.

And the small grain of sand that had bothered him so
Was a beautiful pearl all richly aglow.
Now the tale has a moral; for isn't it grand
What an oyster can do with a morsel of sand.

What couldn't we do if we'd only begin
With some of the things that get under our skin.

~ David Cohen

Our greatest joys and successes often lie on the other side of our greatest irritations or challenges in life. Dave Ramsey built a company, wrote a book and hosts a nationally syndicated radio show talking to people about the very topic that caused him so much heartache and pain - debt (see www.daveramsey.com). John Dilemme stuttered so badly that he couldn't say his own name and now he makes his living as a public speaker (see www.findyourwhy.com). Oprah Winfrey publicly failed several dieting attempts. Look at her now!

Remember the following truths:

• There are no "problems" in life, only challenges!
• The only thing that can stop you is you!
• There is no such thing as failure; only feedback!
• If you persist long enough, there is nothing that you cannot accomplish! A steady drip of water will wear away solid rock. So keep on dripping!!!

I Don't Want To!

My wife and I spent some time talking this evening about the things we want to accomplish this year. One of the major obstacles we both face, and maybe you are facing it to, is that we don't necessarily want to do all the little things that will bring us the results we want. It reminded me of something Mike Litman, a mentor of mine, taught me on his Greatness Held Hostage cd. What he taught me is:

"Successful people do the things they don't want to do!"

You may be facing a difficult or perhaps just an unattractive task that is standing in the way of you and your success. It could be working out every day and eating healthier foods. It may be cutting out unnecessary expenses and saving more money. It may be cultivating a more forgiving attitude and being kind to those who are unkind to you. You know what it is that you don't want to do. The question you really need to ask yourself is: "Do I want the results more than I not wanting to do this task?"

Look at your reasons why you want to accomplish your goals and resolutions. (You did write them down, right?) Are your reasons big enough to carry you past the seeming unpleasantness of doing this task? Is achieving the results important enough to you to do what you don't want to do?

It isn't always motivation that we need - sometimes it is just momentum. Give yourself a 30-day challenge. Perform this "unpleasant" task consistently for 30 days and then evaluate yourself at the end of that period. Is it still as unpleasant as when you started or are you starting to enjoy yourself? I think you will find, more often than not, that the task is not nearly so difficult or unpleasant as what you thought it would be when you started and you will be doing it on a daily basis with ease and great satisfaction. And, if you keep doing that task and either step it up a little more for the next 30 days or add another essential goal-achieving task to your daily regiment, you will be well on your way to achieving your goals and your dreams!

(To find out how to get your own copy of Mike Litman's Greatness Held Hostage cd or a copy of his book Conversations With Millionaires, visit http://www.mikelitman.com/.)